I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
