Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Non-Jews are for practice
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
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