Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize