I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
