i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
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