this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
