So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
