Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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