Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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