awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
and she was petting her beer can
She just used a chaser for red wine.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
