If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
I am naked and annoyed.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
