He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
