hell yes lets make some ravioli
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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