she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
