I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Randomize
