K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
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