Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize
