Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
How external is "for external use only"?
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
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