ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Randomize
