its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
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