sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
