I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Randomize