We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Randomize
