but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Ketchup is God's man juice
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Randomize
