I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
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