You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
