dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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