I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
