Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Randomize