i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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