I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
ok first of all what the fuck
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
