the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
A+ Viking dick
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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