i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
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