She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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