dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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