I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
