Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
