Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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