and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
thus making me awesome and them whores
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
