so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Randomize
