We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Randomize