I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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