How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
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