She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
