Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
