he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Randomize
