Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
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