I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Randomize
