is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
