I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
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