I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Randomize
